During a recent wake, I’ve reminded of a wake I attended a few years ago, also with a batchmate. It was even made sadder by the fact that she was a dear cousin of mine, who succumbed to cancer. She was a close friend of mine in high school, and over the years I would see her and we would chat occasionally until the news came that she was deathly ill. I was with her during her last few days at the hospital.
From that time since then, I’ve had schoolmates and friends who have passed on to the next life. It’s sad to meet friends only during wakes and funerals. You talk about the memories you’ve had with the deceased in the past—as in long PAST. It’s the same even with classmates who are still alive. You meet to attend a wake and talk about the good times. After spending a few hours talking, you go home, exchange numbers, and then WHAT? Almost always, it takes weeks and even months before you send a message to your classmate, if at all. That’s it.
I have to ask myself this question: Why do I have to attend reunions like this because somebody’s dead? Why can’t I meet more friends under less depressing conditions?
That changed my perspective. Why meet up with friends just because somebody’s dead? Why not find the time to meet more, during fun times, and make a connection?
It’s so easy to be blinded by deadlines, workloads, and chores at home and at work. One could easily be so caught up with all the world’s distractions. But if we just take a day’s off to bond, to simply touch someone else’s life with our presence, then that will make a whole lot of difference to you and your friend. It doesn’t have to take a whole day to just chat with a friend.
And so it has become my own conviction to reach out, connect with old friends, create new ones, and make these relationships MEANINGFUL. And this means going out more to mini-reunions and other activities. Some may or may not welcome it, but that’s their problem, not YOURS. If you have a family and guilt over the feeling that you are choosing friends over family, why not make it a family affair? The key to all of it is finding balance.
So reach out and touch a friend. He just might touch yours. You’ll never know until you make that move.